Just a few funny linguistic moments to share:
In ulpan this week, we had to share a recipe. I chose to talk about chocolate chip cookies (specifically this fabulous no-bowl recipe that has literally changed my chesed abilities as I never was a big baker). To recap, I'm the only American in the class. The teacher (formerly from Moscow) asked if I thought it was true that Americans only like sweet food (which struck me as a gross generalization, yet also likely true). Another former Russian in the class was stymied about the concept of chocolate chips. This puzzled me because they are sold in every grocery store and the Hebrew is literally "chocolate chips" transliterated.
So I showed a photo on my phone and we had a chuckle because she was thinking of *these* kind of chips (which is kind of amusing to think of them made out of chocolate and served with ketchup):
We then spoke about the chivito sandwich of Uruguay (oh eek--not to my taste.....a variety of meats [including some biggie non-kosher ones, like both bacon AND ham], cheese and egg. Should be served with a side of Lipitor, in my opinion) and Russian salad (cubed potatoes and carrots slathered in mayo). Let's just say I wasn't rushing out to prepare anything we spoke about in class that night :).
But the episode reminded me of something funny that happened during the race. At around 18 km in, after running on that really soft salty sand (sandy salt?!) I had rocks in my shoe. Hmm....What to do? I was pretty tired by that point and no way could I stand on one foot to take my shoe off. If I sat on the ground, I wasn't totally sure I would be able to get back up.....There were only three more km to go until the end of the race and I wasn't sure there would even be another first aid/refreshment station when: hooray! There wasn't an official station, but standing along the side up ahead was a guy with a Hatzala vest on. He was standing talking to two other men and next to his first aid bag was.....a chair! A super low plastic lounge chair, but better than nothing. He saw me eyeing the situation as I trotted up (speedy running having been left behind a few kilometers back):
"At b'seder? (Are you okay)?"
"Ken. Ani b'seder. Yesh li.....(Yes, I'm fine. I have...."
Hmmm. My brain wasn't working so well in Hebrew at that moment (all energies, as you may well imagine, being concentrated in the lower self). How to say "rocks" in Hebrew???
I thought the word was "avanim" but couldn't quite remember. Especially because that word always seems messed up to me, and I think it should be "anavim".
Oh shoot--"anavim" are grapes. A picture popped into my head of "anavim" being in my shoe.
Hmmmm.....Maybe I had the word ending wrong and it ends in "ot" not "im"....Yeah, that might be it! Maybe I should tell him I have "arnavot" in my shoe. ARGH. No, that's not right. Arnavot are bunnies. A picture popped into my head of pulling my shoe off and THESE falling out:
By that time, I really needed to finish my sentence, I gave up and said in English, "I have rocks in my shoe". He clearly did not speak English but got the idea when I emptied my shoe, got up and left.
Welcome to the inner workings of my brain in Hebrew. As I said to one of my ulpan teachers a few years back after a similar episode, "I'm almost always in the right neighborhood but rarely at the right house" (at least I said THAT correctly in Hebrew).
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