We Are New Immigrants Who Prefer *Not* to Take the Bus

Here's a follow-up to an earlier post:

This is what it's like to take the bus in the morning here:

1) Wait by the bus stop

2) Bus drives by and is so crowded that the driver refuses to stop despite frantic waving from people at the bus stop

3) Begin calculating how late children will be for school and if a note will be necessary.  If so, try to find scrap of paper for note and consider wording.  Will Google Translate be necessary?  Allow neighbor whose Hebrew is much better than yours to write note for both kids using your shoulder as a table.

3) Next bus comes and is similarly crowded, but driver yields to frantic waving and stops.  Briefly.  Very briefly.  If you are not on within about three seconds, tough for you and the driver is gone (note: you may be waiting at the stop and waiting patiently in line to get on the bus.  That is probably your  mistake--savlanut is not to be used when waiting for the bus.  You can be patient once *on* the bus, but not before.

4) Go in back doors of bus because there is no way to get in the front doors.

5) If driver drives off with the front doors open because the bus is so crowded he can't close the doors, be very thankful that you are not the last one on the bus, and hope even more that no small children (who are riding the bus alone) are in the stairwell (note: in their defense, I have never seen a driver go all the way to the next stop with the doors open.  I think there's something about seeing the doors open while the bus is going that makes everyone on the bus squish in closer so that the people on the stairs can move out of danger)

6) Once the crowd empties out, get out of the back door at the stop *near* where you are going and immediately go in the front door so you can pay before your stop

7) Inevitably, find out the hard way that the bus does not go left on the street you want and instead makes a right turn and goes at least 1/4 mile before getting to its first stop

6) get off and walk to where you need to be, commenting on what great shape the family is getting in

7) next time, take the "#11" (slang for walking.  I love the expression)